THE 

PERFECT IMPRESSION OF

BILL AND MELINDA GATES

TO THE WORLD

By 

Søren Nielsen

2021

Bill and Melinda Gates have been married 25 years, raised three kids, are worth $100.9 billion, and run a namesake philanthropic enterprise boasting a $50.7 billion endowment,  but still find the time to do dishes together.

The Gates family always does the dishes after dinner together to remind their kids that home responsibilities aren't just women's work, Melinda said.

The key to a strong marriage is when partners participate in household chores equally, whether that be laundry or packing lunch. 

Women traditionally are seen as responsible for doing unpaid housework. 

Gates discusses the issues tied to unpaid work and gender inequality in her book, "The Moment of Life".

When you can share that responsibility, the marriage becomes more balanced.

"One thing in society we have put on women is we don't talk about how difficult it is to raise children," Gates said in the interview. 

"We just assume women are going to go do it. It takes time and it takes energy, right?"

Here's a look at the marriage between Bill and Melinda, and how they make their relationship work.

Bill and Melinda first met in 1987, when she joined Microsoft as a product manager.

Bill asked her if she could go out "two weeks from tonight" — to which Melinda replied, "Two weeks from tonight? I have no idea what I'm doing two weeks from tonight." 

And I said, "You're not spontaneous enough for me."

Melinda gave Bill her number and told him to call her closer to the day he had in mind.

Instead, he called her up later that night with a wry question: "Is this spontaneous enough for you?" 

Turns out, it was.

Melinda and Bill dated for seven years before they wed. Melinda told, her mom didn't think that seeing the CEO was a good idea in the beginning.

But the couple didn't listen. 

They "kept a low profile at work and asked colleagues and family members to respect their privacy."

"When I look back, Bill was the same kind of guy I was hanging out with in college," Melinda told. 

"I had a lot of respect for them, and they had respect for me."

"I was definitely attracted to his brilliant mind, but beyond that, his curiosity". 

"And he has a huge sense of fun. I love that wry side of him."

After they were engaged, Bill and Melinda traveled to Africa in late 1993. 

During the trip, they encountered people in extreme poverty.

On a walk on a beach in Zanzibar, the couple "started to talk about" how they might use their fortune to help others.

That's when the idea that would ultimately become the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation began to take root.

"It's not fair that we have so much wealth when billions of others have so little," Melinda wrote, in one of the couples' annual letters.

The couple married in 1994 in what was then Manele Bay Hotel in Hawaii. 

They tied the knot by the "par-3 12th hole" on the property's golf course. 

The event reportedly cost 1 million dollars.

To keep the wedding private, Bill Gates booked all the rooms in the hotel, along with all of the helicopters on the island of Maui to "prevent unwanted visitors from flying over".

Bill's parents gifted the newlyweds with a sculpture of two birds, sitting side-by-side and staring at the horizon. 

"It's still in front of our house," Melinda wrote in the couples' 2018 annual letter. 

"I think of it all the time, because fundamentally we’re looking in the same direction."

The next year, the couple's lavish home — nicknamed "Xanadu 2.0" — was completed in Medina, Washington. 

The mansion's estimated worth was 124 million dollars in 2016.

The couple has raised two daughters and a son — and didn't let any of them own a cellphone until they were 14.

Their eldest daughter was born on 26. april 1996 (24 år) and her name is Jennifer Katharine Gates.

Their youngest daughter is Phoebe Adele Gates and she is born on 14. september 2002 (18 år).

and finally their son whose name is Rory John Gates and he is born on 23. maj 1999 (21 år).

Bill told, the children were raised Catholic. 

"We've raised our kids in a religious way," he said. 

"They've gone to the Catholic church that Melinda goes to and I participate in."

Bill and Melinda would read books from a range of genres to their kids as they grew up, from "Guess How Much I Love You" to "Fahrenheit 451."

Bill Gates has said his wife is a driving force when it comes to bringing the family together. 

"Melinda is very creative about helping me find chances to spend time with the kids," Bill Gates wrote in a 2017. 

"Even just driving them to school is a great time to talk to them."

Each of the Gates' kids will inherit about 10 million dollar of their parents' $98.1 billion fortune, while much of the rest will go to charitable causes.

"We want to strike a balance where they have the freedom to do anything but not a lot of money showered on them so they could go out and do nothing".

The Gates also support their kids in other ways. 

The couple spent 37 million dollar purchasing a string of Wellington, Florida properties in 2016. 

The reason? 

Their daughter Jennifer is a nationally ranked show jumper, and the Florida town is the equestrian capital of the US.

Melinda has said her relationship with her husband has changed over time. 

"We've had to change to really be coequals," she said. 

"It's not something that immediately happens overnight, but we're both committed to it."

Melinda says the key to her strong marriage is having an equal partnership with her husband. 

Bill and Melinda still manage to do the dishes together every night.

According to Melinda, Bill was used to being in charge from his Microsoft days when they first started the foundation.

But these days, Bill and Melinda work as partners at the foundation. 

They both received Presidential Medals of Freedom in 2016 from President Barack Obama for their efforts.

They work to make sure their schedules are synchronized, complimentary, and balanced. 

"Melinda and I look over our schedules a lot to make sure we are balancing things well," Bill Gates wrote in a 2018.

In response to a question about how the couple handles arguments, Melinda jokingly wrote "we never disagree" in the Gates' 2018 annual letter.

"Our occasional disagreements these days are over tactics. Because I've been a public figure longer, and because I’m a man, some people assume I am making the big decisions. That's never been the case," Bill wrote in the Gates Foundation's annual letter for 2018.

Melinda added that the couple avoids serious disagreements by sharing fundamental values, trust, and a sense of open-mindedness.

Warren Buffett, who is close with the couple, told, that Bill was "smart as hell, obviously," but that "in terms of seeing the whole picture," Melinda was smarter.

Bill Gates disclosed that his wife and Warren Buffett were his two favorite celebrities...

Warren Buffett speaks to the media with Bill and Melinda Gates June 26, 2006 at a news conference where Warren Buffett spoke about his financial gift to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation in New York City.

When it comes to their working partnership, Bill Gates wrote that the perception that Melinda is "the heart" of the organization is a bit of a stereotype, in the 2018 annual letter.

"Just as she knows I'm more emotional than people realize, I know she's more analytical than people realize. When I get really enthusiastic about something, I count on her to make sure I'm being realistic."

"Melinda and I believe that everyone deserves the chance for a healthy and productive life — and so with the help of our amazing partners, we are working to find innovative ways to help people in need all over the world".